I read your recent account of the multiple assaults of your
"heroes" against various groups of innocent badders traveling along
the Fiver. You correctly note in
each case that the badders put up a "good fight."
But you fail to mention that in each case the badders were ruthlessly
attacked, without warning, by the "heroes" of your tale.
In the future, to avoid having the badders under my command taken
advantage of in such fashion, I have instructed my badders to attack on sight
any "heroes" they may run across.
You have been duly warned.
The Biggest, Baddest Badder of Blue
I must protest your reference to me in your tales as a "scavenging
spider, Attercop." Not only is
your repeated use of the pejorative term "Attercop" most
unprofessional (even the anti-spider polemic The Hobbit correctly
recognized that this is a most offensive way to refer to a spider), but your
description of me as "scavenging" is an outright – and outrageous --
don't "scavenge." We
are much too sophisticated to stoop to such low forms of food-gathering.
I realize that perhaps you were simply repeating what the
"heroes" told you, but as an editor of a worldwide publication, you
should be less credulous. Surely
any sensible person can see that this lie was relayed to you by the
"heroes" to cover up the fact that it was they who were
scavenging in my home. At
least your account of how your "heroes" invaded the homes of several
of my fellow spiders, then awaited them "in ambush" and
"gunned" one down, rings true.
Spyrodiffida the Spider
of the exploits of the criminals who recently blew up our City Hall and our
jail, stole thousands of gold pieces from our treasury, and nearly killed me in
the process is most shameful. Had
these criminals been innocent, as you suggest, they would not have attempted to
escape from the jail, and they certainly would not have stolen more gold than
was originally theirs, as even your account admits that they did.
What you blithely describe as "dispatch[ing] the guard" is, in
civilized places, called "cold-blooded murder." While at first it appeared they might be innocent, your
account makes it clear that the "heroes" are fully deserving of the
full penalty of the law. And that
is what they will receive should they ever return to my jurisdiction.
Redman Town Elder
recount of the encounter between the "heroes"
and we androids of the tunnel south of Settle is inaccurate.
You incorrectly omit the fact that we specifically warned the group to
turn back and offered them the chance to leave the tunnel peacefully.
Yet, even so, they chose to attack us instead.
Your account then appears deliberately to make fun of androids by
describing the mishaps of TD4. Your
attempt to hide your bias by focusing on a member of the group fools no one.
In truth, had it not been for TD4's
-- an android's -- clever actions, we would have easily defeated your
I read with interest your recent saga of the "heroes" from Ent.
As a mutant, I was pleased to read of their victory over the evil Knights
of Genetic Purity. However, I was most dismayed by the group's knee-jerk, wanton
opposition to the Thought Masters and their mutant followers.
Did anyone from the group – or for that matter, from the entire town of
Ent -- ever bother to talk to the Thought Masters to find out what they were
trying to achieve? No. The people
of Ent simply raised an army and attacked, without even considering the
possibility that the Thought Masters and their mutant followers might have been
on their way to Try City to defend it against the imminent attack of the Knights
of Genetic Purity. Yes, that is
exactly what we were doing! But we
never got there because of your "heroes," and instead the town of Try
City was wiped out in a most heinous manner.
Thus, while we applaud your heroes' thwarting of the plans of the Knights
of Genetic Purity, we cannot praise your group's interference – indeed, fierce
opposition – to our attempt to fight the common foe.
In the future, we suggest greater coordination would benefit all mutants.
mutant soldier recuperating in Rose City
Let us review for a moment the behaviour of your "heroes"
toward the Knights of Genetic Purity:
First, in our very first encounter,
on the road outside Ent, two of your "heroes" hid from us and the other four lied
to us. Had they any honor, your
"heroes" would have confronted us directly, without deception or
Second, your "heroes"
attacked a small group that we left behind to guard the USDOE radioactive
facility. As your own account makes
clear, your group not only attacked the guards unprovoked, but then proceeded to
torture them in horrific and inhumane
ways, even after it was clear they had no further information to give.
Third, your heroes attacked, once
again unprovoked, our bridge guard. Although
your account makes it sound like a brave assault was made, in truth, the
principal combatant – the grotesquely-mutated sasquatch called
"Punisher" – was virtually invisible, having chosen to use translux.
Your account conveniently leaves this key fact out.
Worse, your account claims that the bridge guard leader set off a grenade
"to kill himself," when in fact he nobly sacrificed his life in an
effort to destroy the invisible monster (which he believed to be nearby), and
thereby protect his fellow knights in Wall.
Finally, one has only to read your
rendition of the assault on Wall to realize that your "heroes" used translux
and trickery to repeatedly attack and kill unsuspecting and defenseless
knights. It is precisely this sort
of "heroism" that we, the Knights of Genetic Purity, seek to stamp out
by ridding this world of mutants and their decadent ways.
We encourage all those pure strain humans who are appalled by the
behavior of the "heroes" of your adventure to contact us about how
such behavior in the future may be stopped and appropriately redressed.
Sergeant, Knights of Genetic Purity
readers to date.